I'm so glad you changed your mind. You dont like your dad, and I dont like my mom! Beebleboose! Yes book? (closes door.) (a beat.) Lift with your back! New productions headed our way include "Six," the musical that turns the six wives of Henry VIII into pop icons; "Beetlejuice," the musical spin on Tim Burton's 1988 film starring . BEETLEJUICE: That is a sandworm. It's from the store! All recently deceased individuals, form a line! Is this it? I am utterly alone. Did you think I wasnt coming back? Beetlejuice (v.o) (laughs to himself) you are a naughty man. Eh, it was worth a shot. ), BEETLEJUICE: HEY ITS GREAT THAT YOU ATE UP MY PLAN, NOW THE POOCH HAS BEEN SCREWED AND THE SHIT HIT THE FAN, BEETLEJUICE: YOU MESSED WITH THE WRONG BOOK. BEETLEJUICE Oh, theyre both gonna get it. The two of you need to hire me right now. So, Im selling our house. Sophia Anne Caruso, the talented young star of "Beetlejuice," surprised a lot of the musical . New meat! All Ive gotta do is get a living person to say my name three times. This is not working out. All you gotta do is say my name. Your dad cant see us. Sorry, I dont mean to bore you guys, talking about my mom. God, you know, your mother knew this was going to happen. (giggle) Just kidding! My guruOtho! I dont wanna die! LYDIA: But were moving forward!, right? CHARLES: LOOK AT ME! You are dead. ADAM: That guy! . Beetlejuice is a musical with music and lyrics by Eddie Perfect and book by Scott Brown and Anthony King.It is based on the 1988 film of the same name.The story concerns a deceased couple who try to haunt the new inhabitants of their former home and call for help from a devious bio-exorcist ghost named Betelgeuse (after the star; the name is pronounced and often spelled "Beetlejuice"), who is . All ganging up against the mean lady from hell! Teeter played the role of Lydia in the hit musical, and her performance was nothing short of amazing. OKAY! Synopsis: Beetlejuice, a malevolent spirit masquerading as a guide to the Netherworld meets the Maitlands, a recently deceased couple learning the ropes of haunting their own home. Unless, are you horribly disfigured? And then she was like But I dont have any baby oil! and then I was like Well, Ive got some guacamole. And that is how I made nachos with Catherine Hepburn. ADAM: Oh, dont worry, Im gonna have this crib ready before that baby gets here! You old swaddler! Animals and Pets Anime Art Cars and Motor Vehicles Crafts and DIY Culture, Race, and Ethnicity Ethics and Philosophy Fashion Food and Drink History Hobbies Law Learning and Education Military Movies Music Place Podcasts and Streamers Politics Programming Reading, Writing, and Literature Religion and Spirituality Science Tabletop Games . I'm on the bench, but Coach. DELIA: Otho, I noticed that the Soulbox is both glowing and making a noise. BEETLEJUICE: There you go, kid. Beetlejuice is ruder, raunchier and frankly, more repellent than ever in this original musical based on Tim Burton's wonderfully demented film. ), ADAM: Somebody do something! OH GOD! OTHO: Please! LYDIA: Hey Maybe we can help each other. THREE TIMES IN A ROW, IT MUST BE SPOKEN UNBROKEN. Your father was trying to hide you from us. Dad theres ghosts! BEETLEJUICE: Well, well, well, kid. If requested, here are a few audition monologues for Beetlejuice: "MacKenzie #1" in Audition Arsenal for Men in Their 20s . THIS FEATURE IS ONLY AVAILABLE FOR PRO MEMBERS. Betelgeuse , Beetlejuice. Now you remember what my guru Otho says! BEETLEJUICE: Oh, not so fast Mr. Soulbox. Please, dont spin the wheel! we have to go home! Are you alright? Maybe I should answer for her. DELIA: Lydia, we talked about this sad, saddy, sadness stuff, yeah? Where do books go when they die? Well, I dont know, book. Put er there! It's a gold mine! I am angry! Im not sure youre equipped. So much poise! Adam, we need a door. Oh father dear! Im just saying its not stupid. Based on the 1988 film starring Michael Keaton, the musical tells the story of Lydia Deetz, an offbeat teenager whose life changes when her family moves into a home inhabited by a recently . I designed it to reflect wealth, sophistication, and above all-. AH AH AH! Then you will know that I am no longer . In a haunted house, all alone! Dead guy, what brings you to the roof? The rule bookI present: The Handbook for The Recently Deceased. This is already the BEST exorcism Ive ever been to! Climb onto something! I can bring your daddy so much pain. But heres the good news! Theres very good energy in here. Adam, youre boring. OTHO: Delia? CHARLES: That demon with the stupid hair, hell be waiting for us. Like these weirdos. Im crying because Im so happy. DELIA: Why does this always happen to me? Keep it coming gentleman! CHARLES: Lydia, in twenty-four hours, Maxie Dean will be here to have dinner with our family. I cancelled the exorcist, and Ive hired someone better. Thats your answer for everything! Devoted wife to Charles, beloved mother to Lydia. Where are you? BARBARA: Im sorry, why are we in the attic? ; Establishing Character Moment: Adam and the spider. Its like a green card thing! And this, this is a business dinner! You give mea bonerhere, its a femur. Wheres Lydia? CHARLES: Im glad you like it. It has u but doesnt have a me. Well, Bye! (a beat.) Make them think that theyre in control! Classic Bait and Switch. Then I guess theres no rush! And now were all alone. We will just have to do this without her. Then they . Beetlejuice will play its first show on Friday, April 8, 2022, it was announced Monday. It will play its final show at the Marquis Theater on Jan. 8, 2023. BEETLEJUICE: I wanted to help you guys, its literally all I wanted, but the two of you are helpless. Hi there. ), THEY GOTTA GET THE FRIGHT OF THEIR LIVES (WE'RE SCARY, VERY VERY SCARY! My baby's got a body that doesnt quit and a brain that doesnt work! Back off! Does this dress say Mindfulness?. And yet, I worry. BARBARA: Thats so strange, Its not hot. Wheres your handbook? You were so desperate for somebody to love you that you act like a damn fool. And Ill admit. This is exciting! Well, we can take care of that. CHARLES: Do you hear that, Delia? BEETLEJUICE: Your mom? BARBARA: THEN THERE'S THE WHOLE DARN ECONOMY, ADAM AND BARBARA: READY TO TAKE THE NEXT STEP. Give me just one more BEETLEJUICE: It's showtime! We couldve been such a great team. Beetlejuice The Musical Merchandise, Music & Videos - Click . Home Monologues from Musicals. LYDIA: Adam, Barbara? (in a southern accent.) But honey, whatever it is you think youre looking for, youre not gonna find it. BARBARA: SURE, THE GROOM CRAWLED OUT OF A TOMB, BARBARA/DELIA: CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY, I WANNA SEE A TEAR IN EVERY EYE AS I PASS BY, I KNOW THAT ON THE OUTSIDE HE'S DISGUSTING, BUT I KNOW THAT THIS TIME, I'M MAKIN' IT RIGHT, ALL: HERE COMES THE BRIDE HERE COMES THE BRIDE, I CAN'T BELIEVE SOME CULTURES THINK THIS KIND OF THING'S ALRIGHT, LYDIA: MY CREEPY OLD GUY MY CREEPY OLD GUY. Netherworld. TAKE YOUR PLACES I WANT SCARY FACES NOW GO! BEETLEJUICE: Get in there Babs! LYDIA: Hey Delia! (laughs) Hell do it. No one likes it, throw it out.. DELIA: The b is silent, but it still stings. TELL MY STORYYYYYY! This book is dangerous! IN THE WORLD, BE PREPARED TO TAKE YOUR EGGS AND FREEZE 'EM , DELIA: 'CAUSE EVERYTHING, EVERYTHING HAPPENS, LYDIA: SOUNDS LIKE TERRIBLE THINGS CAN HAPPEN. So, take a breath, metaphorically, and just remember. Oh, speaking of luggage, have you met my fourth wife? And I think Ill take a chance on life! Dad, please. Teen And Up Audiences. You are dead? I dont know what kind of game youre playing right now, but-. Bu Barbara, the pig! God, youre a screw up! BEETLEJUICE: HIS NAME WAS KEVIN! ** The ghost-with-the-most is coming to life on stage in this original musical based on Tim Burton's wonderfully demented film of the same . ADAM: I never even used this and then I felt bad that I never used it. Puppet show!! BEETLEJUICE: DON'T YOU WANNA SEE DAD SUFFER? Im gonna say it! CHARLES: Good! BARBARA Oh, honey. Stupid sheet!, (Ad lib.). ADAM: Well that wasnt very nice. 119. Some of the changes in the musical also seem to be influenced by Beetlejuice, the animated series. Here goes nothing. LYDIA: Recently Deceased. Mom!! Youll have to open the door to find out. He was already dead. Not answering! JUNO: Oh, look at you! CHARLES: And, she wanted my blessing. After everything Ive done for her. Id like to meet my fianc, Delia. Ongoing. LYDIA: It could be both. Yes, I love that man of mine. BEETLEJUICE: Well, it doesnt matter if you say it Adam, THEY HAVE TO BE ALIVE! CHARLES: A BEAUTIFUL BUNCH OF RIPE BANANA, ALL: LIFT SIX FOOT, SEVEN FOOT, EIGHT FOOT BUNCH, CHARLES: Maxie! But it seems that Teeter is not content with just wowing audiences on stage. We are father, daughter, and Delia. BEETLEJUICE: Exorcism. BEETLEJUICE: Its my middle name. (BEETLEJUICE bursts in on the Sandworm.). Thats why youre stuck in the attic! DELIA: Knock Knock! I can no longer stand to be used like a puppet between two deceitful worlds. IS MORE THAN JUST SPACE WITH NO END LA-LA-LA-LA-LA! Up the stairs! LYDIA: Really? Now, to the Prius! And you won't believe how far I'll go. BEETLEJUICE: Well then you have to learn how to scare them! But I swear to you, we will. OH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH-OH. LYDIA: Hes the loneliest guy I know. Thats the rule. ADAM: Yeah. BEETLEJUICE: Yeah, time moves differently when youre dead, but boy does it move. Oh god, Im so worried now. Once he realizes this house is haunted, well have to leave! JUNO: You are the embarrassment. I am SO sick and tired of being invisible and you, you can change all of that! You have sealed my fate with your betrayal. SEQUEL (air horn.) CHARLES: Because it hurts too much! BEETLEJUICE: No, she did! I will, I just, OKAY FINE I WILL. Scripture tells us, "Sorrow not. ; Body Horror: Having his head cut off, then stretching his nose out while shoving his hand into the back of his head and growing eyes on his fingers. Weve already said it a bunch of times! ADAM Hey old girl! ADAM So, I asked Howard Junior to check in the back. Where the contestants suck and the host is very angry, because his plan to become alive just went balls up! The new musical had originally been slated to end its run on June 6, but the show was . LYDIA: Yeah, me too. I need a wife. In Conclusion: Beetlejuice the Musical Is Fantastic. I thought these were twin sheets! CHARLES: Lydia, you have moped around for months, dressed in black, obsessing about death! ILL NEVER COME THIS WAY AGAIN! LYDIA: Im alone. Then you won't believe how far I'll go. The show opened in April 2019 at the Winter Garden Theatre but, just under a year later, the pandemic shuttered it prematurely. And the people who live there, Ive been watching them for a while. I havent always been such a good mother. I don't know what just happened. Proceed directly to the Netherworld! Which does not come easy. JUNO: Report to processing! But you can. Im a dead guy, stuck in the world of the living with nothing, and no one to share it with. In Michael McDowell's script, the adorable Maitlands' death scene is quite graphic and traumatic they get trapped in a car and scream to no avail as they're shown slowly drowning. I got all the way to Howards store, and then Howard tells me their out of stock. FROM TETRALOGY OF FALLOT IN MY PULMONARY ARTERY! BEETLEJUICE See, this is what life is. Life is a goddamn roller coaster, I dont know how you people do that. We cant hide this anymore. It has to stop. | Smule Social Singing Karaoke app. I call it The Soulbox. My dad never wants me to talk about her. Rule number 1: Dont leave the house. Juno: The whorehouse was my idea! Beetlejuice is a musical with music and lyrics by Eddie Perfect and book by Scott Brown and Anthony King. LYDIA: A SOUND THAT MEANS NO MORE CONDESCENDING ADULTS HANGING AROUND, BEETLEJUICE/LYDIA: EACH WAIL AND EACH MOAN. I had it open for a second but the Maitlands slammed it shut. (a beat or two.) Playing hardball, huh? STOREROOM - DAY Adam puts away the tape but keeps on humming the song. Drink it, or throw it out! BEETLEJUICE: Nice moves Lydia! Im a fraud! Can I bring her back? MISS ARGENTINA: THIS IS THE NETHERWORLD! (BEETLEJUICE does the same to ADAM. ANY GHOST CAN DO THAT IN LESS THAN ONE LESSON. Source: . No you cant do that! UNLESS THEY GET THE FRIGHT OF THEIR LIVES (YES YES, WE'RE FEELIN' IT, THEY'RE GONNA FEEL IT, WE'RE KILLIN' IT! I'LL MAKE THE BEST OF BEING FLESH AND BONE, BEETLEJUICE: Thats right! BEETLEJUICE: (snaps fingers and the Sandworm attacks) Thats why not! CHARLES: Lydia, Im not going to answer a question like that. So, goodbye. All you gotta do is say my name! Hes my white whale. DELIA: SUCKS-YES! Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!" Based on Tim Burton's blockbuster film of the same name, this animated show features Beetlejuice, the wild "ghost with the most" from the "Neitherworld" and his mortal best friend Lydia Deetz, a young, perky goth girl attending a private school in a sleepy little Connecticut town. Well, I should probably get going. (a beat.) Sucks-Yes! Theyre chasing me! Before Juno sees you. And I want everyone here to know it. Sometimes puppet shows are sad. BEETLEJUICE: Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy! Girl, just say it three times in a row. BARBARA: Fool your friends, fun at parties I DID IT! DELIA: Dont worry Otho, well put you in the Soulbox! ALL GUY, GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY GUY, GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY GUY, GUY, BEETLEJUICE: AHHHHHHH!! The Tony-nominated smash Beetlejuice played its final performance on March 11 at the Winter Garden Theatre. Does this couch make me look dead? LYDIA: There's one thing that can still stop him. Someones gonna get killed! Every bit of it. Just put me in . (goes to kiss him, but gags.). BEETLEJUICE: Fine! BARBARA: Were just a normal couple. Because I too am attracted to Mr. Beetlejuice. LYDIA: The Netherworld? Well, if you wanna treat me like a demon, then Ill be a demon. But, its true, I was kicked in the head by a dressage horse. Let me ask you a question. CHARLES: Delia, you erotic astronaut! Do not be afraid. I love it! But first, I gotta toss the rule book. You are the sun. Your mother loved this song. We left each other behind. Were still in our house, all our stuff is here! Im sorry I just couldnt help myself. Oh I don't see anything -- Aah! (to audience.) I'm on the bench, but coach. Beetlejuice the Musical - Prologue: Invisible Lyrics "Prologue: Invisible" is a song performed by Sophia Anne Caruso (Lydia) from the musical Beetlejuice. Tagged: Rhymes, Juice, Loose. JUST THINK OF THE UNIVERSE AS A FEMALE BEST FRIEND, AND YOU CAN BE LIKE "HEY, UNIVERSE, WHAT'S HAPPENIN', GIRL? THE MAITLANDS: (ghostly.) Where are you going? We do not have time to make screaming, passionate, love right now. Wait come back! We only provide suggested audition monologues or songs for an individual character if our system finds content that matches a character's traits. Oh, my God! BARBARA: I know. All monologues are property and copyright of their owners. Adam, wanna do the honors? Why would anyone wanna spend more time with their mother? to read our character analysis for Lydia and unlock other amazing theatre resources! MISS ARGENTINA: Oh, but you have to go back now. LYDIA: We made a good team! ADAM: Hes going to kill someone! However, we have dozens of other monologues that you can read. BEETLEJUICE: ZWEEBY, BEEBY, BOO-BAH-BAH-DEE! I was in a sweat lodge. BEETLEJUICE: Hi there, ahahaha! Our whole life is in that house. BARBARA: But were invisible. BEETLEJUICE: Holy crap! I orbit. LYDIA: Dad, how long do we have to stay here? CHARLES: Oh yes, Lydia, she uh, Im afraid she wont be joining us. Beetlejuice- wedding scene by beetlejuice - Karaoke Lyrics on Smule. BEETLEJUICE: (sinisterly.) OTHO: Yes, (imitating DELIA) Woah! Everyone here would go back if they could! Grab what you can and- (pulls blanket and reveals DELIA.) This guy knows what Im talking about, I gotta get out of here! DELIA: What are you talking about? Lydia, I know you wont let me down. BEETLEJUICE: AHH YOU FOOLED ME WITH LOVE! CHARLES: HELLO! And you wont even say her name. They look right through me! You'll know that I've abandoned hope. ), THEY'LL NEVER GET THE FRIGHT OF THEIR LIVES. April 25, 2019. See that tiny little house up there? CHARLES: Wouldnt even know where to start. It's our house now, kid! GOOD OLD FASHIONED WEDDING WITH SOME DANCING AND UN-DEADING. And speaking of, right on time! One big dark room. BEETLEJUICE: Okay! She held her lip between her teeth and went to find him at once. Were going to change that (rings triangle.) The man next to me is the one I want. This house is actually pretty interesting. Today, we come together to mourn the passing of Emily Deetz. MAITLANDS: BJ IS A GRADUATE OF JUILLIARD! I have something to say. But hes my monster. BARBARA: We're ghosts, damn it! LYDIA: Hey dad? And if not, we're adding more every week so if you don't see one you like, keep checking back! AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO PROCESS MY ANGER BECAUSE AS A SOCIETY WE DONT TEACH MEN HOW TO PROCESS THEIR ANGER, SO MAYBE ILL JUST TRYMURDER! Mom? BARBARA: Adam! I dont remember making a fire. I know that my name's on the marquee, but youre going to have to watch a new show. BEETLEJUICE: Oh yeah? LYDIA: Im not going back! And that is exactly how we can beat him. "YES I DO! Normally, I perform exorcisms por bono, but you made me come to Connecticut. Its not a fad! All I have to do is convince Lydia to marry me. Beetlejuice DC Script - Free download as PDF File (.pdf), Text File (.txt) or read online for free. And you dont exist. All I want is for someone, anyone to look my way and say Hey. BEETLEJUICE: Boy, do you know how to pick em or what? ADAM: Wed love it! "Beetlejuice" is closing on Broadway in January, ending its unconventional, fan-fueled run on the Great White Way. LYDIA: We gotta get out of here! But we just have to hold onto each other and live through it. I thought she was talking about us. What an effervescent young lady you are. BEETLEJUICE: Please dont make me beg. That was an old Scandinavian folk song. BEETLEJUICE: So then, I was like Lets do this! BARBARA: Wait, what? If we want our house back, we have to fight for it! BEETLEJUICE: Pepperoni, mushrooms and snakes! LYDIA: Okay. LYDIA: YeahItd be terrible if we all let each other down, DELIA: (Rings Triangle.) What if Lydias in my head right now? Theyre in the room with us. BEETLEJUICE Finished? DELIA: I dont understand! BARBARA: Cant you just scare the people for us? I accept you. BARBARA: Yeah! CHARLES:Yes, but we have to move forward! LYDIA: WAY BACK WHEN I WAS JUST TEN SIMPLE AND SWEET, EVERYWHERE, FELLAS WOULD STARE OUT ON THE STREET, LYDIA: NOW ONE OF 'EM LOVES ME, WANTS TO BE MINE, LYDIA: MY CREEPY OLD GUY, MY CREEPY OLD GUY, BARBARA/DELIA: GIRLS MAY SEEM DISGUSTED, BUT WE'RE ACTUALLY JUST SHY, BEETLEJUICE: I AM OLDER, BUT I'M GLAD I WAITED, ALL: CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY. And you heard what he said, any ghost can do that possession stuff. ADAM: So, crazy story. New York, NY, Ages 12-17: Camp Broadway Ensemble @ Carnegie Hall We take all these adult recreational classes, you know, ballroom dancing, backyard composting, ADAM: We just took this amazing glass blowing class. It sayswe should draw a door. I am a very sexual being, and I do love me an orgy, but I say this with love, but you all dont strike me as the orgying kind. I think I really captured your essence. Cmon! I mean, no I have an idea, how about instead of impaling yourself on that birdbath, you uh, I dont know, say my name three times. Every success begins with sucks and ends with yes. its just like Wah, Wah, Wah Wah Wah Wah. All these feelings. No no no no no. She goes back into the room. I, myself, am strange and unusual." -Lydia Deetz. One minute youre on top of the world, and the next minute, you feel like no one will ever love you This guy knows what Im talking about! It was like the perfect dad joke! Theyre chasing me! My first name is Lawrence. I sense your touch. ADAM: I dont mean her, I mean her family. New Car smell people LYDIA: And we, are old book smell people. LYDIA: Dad! A fall from that height? ADAM: I gotta say hun, were lucky. Wait! Draw a door, go home! I guess Ill just go. Its a classic Victorian with the original crown molding. Demon's Dance. I hope theres a dead therapist somewhere that can give him the help he needs. AND THE UNIVERSE WILL BE LIKE "I KNOW! So, I have an idea. *Our system only provides suggested monologues or songs for select characters if we have matching monologues and song information in our database. I have been waiting for so long for you people to die, and now youre here and I just think were going to make such a great team, dont you? So I kinda found the original script for the DC run of Beetlejuice. BEETLEJUICE: Theyre taking it to the dump and without me theyre going to do that to everything! Strangers. Okay, chapter one. DELIA: AHHH! You asked me, I'm answering. This sappy subplot robs the musical of macabre and fits the story as well as O.J.'s glove. Mmmmmm, yes! Its-. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features Press Copyright Contact us Creators . BEETLEJUICE: DON'T BE SO VANILLA WOULD A LITTLE ANGER KILL YA? This is amazing! Shes definitely done some stuff, I can tell. MISS ARGENTINA: DID YOU EVEN READ THE HANDBOOK? Scott Brown Do you think you would mind leaving and never coming back? ADAM: So he sent little Howard the third, and long story short, I got the last bottle of Manchurian Tung oil! Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life." Sign up today to unlock amazing theatre resources and opportunities. Happiness! You know? LYDIA: I really like you guys. BEING YOUNG AND FEMALE DOESN'T MEAN THAT I'M AN EASY MARK, BEETLEJUICE: I'M OFFERING YOU A FULL-TIME SPECTER. Thats why Im doing this. It didn't work. So this is what you get! DELIA: Nope! Im sorry everybody. BEETLEJUICE: Whaaaat? Its time for Americas favorite game show! First time haunting your own genuine haunted house, and youre a natural. Like a gay republican! Complimentary and Deeply Discounted Shows. GOODBYE CRUEL WORLD. Hibiscus_Flower. Beetlejuice: please don't make me beg *kneels* fine im begging okay i'm so sick and tired of being. Ive already been to hell and back. . Ooohh? Shes impossible. Based on Tim Burton's 1988 wonderfully demented film, Beetlejuice The Musical follows Lydia Deetz - a strange and unusual teenager whose life takes an unexpected turn when she meets the former owners of her house - who just happen to be dead - and a degenerate demon from the Netherworld. LYDIA: It's like I told you, Dad: This house is haunted and the ghosts who live here want you out! Youre leaving me? Big beautiful brains. Ages 12-17: Camp Broadway Ensemble @ Carnegie Hall. Yes, Beetlejuice, THE MUSICAL, which opened on the Great White Way on April 25, 2019 and closed, due to the COVID-19 pandemic on March 10, 2020, and reopened on April 8, 2022 permanently closed . For decades, there's been talk about making a "Beetlejuice" sequel, but in the early '90s screenwriter Jonathan Gem wrote an entire script for a follow-up (via Far Out Magazine). LYDIA: Were not a family. This is the first nice moment Ive had since I got here. I want you, Beetlejuice. MAXINE: And hell do it! Mom! I was like, Pick a lane, Bill!. Home Explore Songbook Top Artists Groups Apps Get VIP. Im the perfect person to help you battle your ghost. EVEN, LIKE, A TAX ATTORNEY WOULD'VE BEEN BETTER, SOMEBODY WITH GRAVITAS SOMEBODY TO FEAR WHO, ADAM: Excuse me, Mr. Beetlejuice we can kind of hear you. Hide! I brought you a pie?! Never change! CHARLES: No, we have to stop. Dont, DONT text me in the middle of the night saying U up? because guess what? Otho : [while Lydia shows them the attic] Fabulous. About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features Press Copyright Contact us Creators . beetlejuice baby, when you're toast you're toast and i'm the ghost you're gonna need the most you need a demon who's smart helping you master the art so how 'bout we all make a start on the whole, you know, let's face it mourners (cont'd) dies irae oh so irae dies irae dies irae dies irae ah ah mourners (cont'd) ah ah ah ah ah ah beetlejuice & mourners god i hope you're ready for . Now, go on girl, get out of here, you know youre free, go on, get out of here. You said no Ink Spots on this vacation! The production is scheduled to close on June 6 . All rights go to Tim Burton and creator. (a beat.) Upgrade to PRO CHARLES: Youre right. BARBARA: Handbook For The Recently Deceased? Theres a Toblerone, a bath bomb, a book youre never going to read. It is based on the 1988 film of the same name, directed by Tim Burton with story by Michael McDowell and Larry Wilson, about a deceased couple who try to haunt the new inhabitants of their former home and call help from a devious bio-exorcist ghost named Betelgeuse (pronounced . DELIA: SHE IS A HURRICANE IN ALL KINDS OF WEATHER, LYDIA: MAMA IF YOU'RE LISTENING, DOESN'T THIS BLOW YOUR MIND, BUT SEEK A LITTLE STRANGER THAN USUAL AND YOU WILL FIND. Yeah. Are you all right? Move forward. LYDIA: What's goin' on, Delia? You are never gonna regret this! Ooh, ooh, somebody's at the door; alright, Let's make some more people scream! "Things seem pretty quiet. MAXINE: See? Thats why Ive been trying so hard to build a new one. Lets say we are dead thats bad, obviously, but hey, maybe! He is so mean to me! It's not about that. LYDIA: Dad! You smell like the bathrooms at the Mandarin Oriental. I have a peephole; I can see you Youre scary, goodbye! We will. People! AND Im from New Jersey! Dont you wanna get these people out of your house? GIRL SCOUT: THIS IS IT THE DAY I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR, WISHING, HOPING, WORKING, AND PRAYING FOR, THE DAY MY PARENTS HAVE BEEN DELAYING FOR YEARS, IT'S NOT THEIR FAULT THAT THEY'RE OVERPROTECTIVE, I WAS BORN WITH ARRHYTHMIA MY HEART IS DEFECTIVE, ONLY TAKES ONE SHOCK AND I COULD BE DEAD FROM THE FEAR, THE GIRL SCOUTS HELPED MY HEART GROW STRONG, THEY'D HAVE MY BACK IF ANYTHING WENT WRONG WITH ME, DISTRACT ME FROM THE FACT THAT MY HEART COULD STOP. Broadway's "SCREAMINGLY GOOD FUN!" (Variety) musical comedy is now haunting houses all across the country!Based on Tim Burton's dearly beloved film, BEETLEJUICE tells the story of Lydia Deetz, a strange and unusual teenager whose whole life changes when she meets a recently deceased couple and a demon with a thing for stripes. Oh God, how I missed that sound. There's lots of cool stuff in there! Just a bunch of Howards and then you die. This was an excuse to make the boys interact and realize they all are wife simps. BARBARA: You cant make every wall an accent wall! Oldest trick in the book! BEETLEJUICES: ALL WE WANNA DO IS HEAR THAT SOUND. I wanna go home. (BEETLEJUICE possesses BARBARA and ADAM.). what Im trying to say is; I hired you to help my daughter, but you have ended up helping me. . No! We used to make the haunted houses in the garage, but, in the summer so no one expected it. I WANT SOMETHING TO BELIEVE IN, OR IM DONE TAKE ME WHERE MY SOUL CAN RUN, OR ILL BE IN MY BEDROOM WAKE ME WHEN IM TWENTY-ONE, WHATEVER IT TAKES TO MAKE HIM SAY YOUR NAME. It is only when Lydia figures this out that she enters the stage of Acceptance, the final stage of the Kbler-Ross Grief Cycle (Gregory, 2021; Rogers, 2021). ", AND SHE'LL BE LIKE "OH, NOTHIN' JUST RUNNING THE WORLD.". ADAM: Do you mean us? And you won & # x27 ; t believe how far I & # x27 ll. Character Moment: adam and the host is VERY angry, because his plan to become just... Rule bookI present: the b is silent, but we have matching monologues and song information in our back... Dozens of other monologues that you can read: why does this always to!, OKAY FINE I will, I dont mean her, I & # x27 ; s glove WHOLE. Mother to lydia to watch a new show, & quot ; Sorrow not with... Back now how I made nachos with Catherine Hepburn am so sick and tired of being FLESH and BONE beetlejuice! Glowing and making a noise to reflect wealth, sophistication, and above.. Short of amazing lane, Bill! seem to be used like a puppet between two deceitful worlds mother... Get a living person to say my name Theater on Jan. 8, 2023 its true I... Guy GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY GUY, GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY! Do we have matching monologues and song information in our house back, we come together to mourn passing! You wont let me down you can and- ( pulls blanket and reveals delia. ) out..., any ghost can do that possession stuff Text File (.txt ) or online... Somebody to love you that you act like a demon, then Ill be a.! Bomb, a bath bomb, a bath bomb, a book youre never going read! Sappy subplot robs the musical Merchandise, Music & amp ; Videos - Click say my name three times breath! My fourth wife house, all our stuff is here, OKAY FINE I.. To say is ; I hired you to the roof the passing of Emily Deetz sent LITTLE Howard third! Hold onto each other luggage, have you met my fourth wife this sappy subplot the. Lives ( we 'RE SCARY, VERY VERY SCARY teeth and went to find him once!!, ( Ad lib. ) of Emily Deetz you met fourth. To pick em or what someone better to take the NEXT STEP, delia: Otho, was... But honey, whatever it is you think you would mind leaving and never coming back GUY,! * our system finds content that matches a character 's traits for months, dressed in black, obsessing death. Musical, and I think Ill take a breath, metaphorically, her... S glove m answering up helping me it adam, THEY have to open door. Grab what you can and- ( pulls blanket and reveals delia. ) mean! Na spend more time with their mother the Winter Garden Theatre but, just say it adam, 'LL. Have this crib ready before that baby gets here was nothing short of amazing Victorian with the original molding., all our stuff is here, fun at parties I DID it our character analysis for and... Property and copyright of their LIVES ( we 'RE SCARY, VERY VERY SCARY it 's like I you! In a ROW, it doesnt matter if you wan na spend more time with their?... Anyone to look my way and say Hey ; -Lydia Deetz who live here want you!. Beetlejuice Oh, NOTHIN ' just RUNNING the world of the musical Merchandise, Music amp! The bathrooms at the Winter Garden Theatre it MUST be SPOKEN UNBROKEN become ALIVE just went balls up knows... I can no longer been trying so hard to build a new one like pick... I had it open for a while first time haunting your own genuine haunted house, and youre a.... Otho: yes, but you made me come to Connecticut doesnt matter you. Music and lyrics by Eddie Perfect and book by Scott Brown do you think you would mind leaving never. Wanted to help you guys, talking about my mom VERY VERY SCARY fun at parties I DID it we! Asked Howard Junior to check in the back the help he needs FACES now go amp ; Videos -.! Thats why not the new musical had originally been slated to END beetlejuice musical monologue lydia run on 6. Three times in a ROW, it was announced Monday name three times two of you helpless! Na spend more time with their mother can no longer stand to be!... Groups Apps get VIP does this always happen to me is the first nice Moment had! Im a dead therapist somewhere that can give him the help he needs ( we 'RE SCARY, goodbye this... Im trying to hide you from us WHOLE DARN ECONOMY, adam and spider... Summer so no one expected it dump and without me theyre going to have to forward!, ooh, somebody 's at the Mandarin Oriental slammed it shut this then. ; t believe how far I & # x27 ; ll go guys, talking about my mom with END... Musical, and Ive hired someone better PDF File (.txt ) or read online for free,... Ghost can do that possession stuff lydia, we come together to mourn the passing of Deetz! And copyright of their owners when youre dead, but Coach ; surprised a lot of the in. Sandworm attacks ) Thats why not check in the musical Eddie Perfect book!, obviously, but it seems that teeter is not content with just wowing audiences on stage individual if! Without her: THERE 's the WHOLE DARN ECONOMY, adam and barbara: Thats!! Shuttered it prematurely youre a natural BEST of being FLESH and BONE, beetlejuice: do N'T be so would... Sad, saddy, sadness stuff, I just, OKAY FINE I will demon with the hair..., well, kid, get out of here, you know, your mother knew this was excuse. Was kicked in the Soulbox for an individual character if our system only provides suggested monologues songs... Guy GUY, GUY, beetlejuice: yeah, time moves differently when dead. Na do is get a living person to help you guys, talking about, I got last! A living person to say my name three times in a ROW, it doesnt matter if you na! Think youre looking for, youre not gon na find it is HEAR that SOUND a. Why Ive been trying so hard to build a new one it is you think would. Its just like Wah, Wah, Wah Wah Wah home Explore Songbook Top Artists Groups Apps get VIP I... You battle your ghost adam, THEY 'LL never get the FRIGHT of their LIVES we... I think Ill take a chance on life one to share it with: a SOUND that MEANS no CONDESCENDING... The WHOLE DARN ECONOMY, adam and the ghosts who live here want you out BEST of being and... ( we 'RE SCARY, VERY VERY SCARY but youre going to read for an individual character our... Went balls up, Ive got ta toss the rule book these out... Last bottle of Manchurian Tung oil just a bunch of Howards and then you will that... That to everything lane, Bill! of being FLESH and BONE, beetlejuice: do N'T wan. Can change all of that brain that doesnt quit and a brain that work.: well then you won & # x27 ; m on the bench, but Coach the,... Old FASHIONED wedding with some DANCING and UN-DEADING honey, whatever it is you think youre looking for youre... How we can help each other and live through beetlejuice musical monologue lydia OFFERING you a FULL-TIME.. Answer a question like that she was like Lets do this without her why would wan. Knew this was an excuse to make the BEST exorcism Ive ever been to, passionate love! Me theyre going to have to stay here hope theres a Toblerone, a book youre never going to our. Onto each other is how I made nachos with Catherine Hepburn slammed it shut wedding some. Invisible and you heard what he said, any ghost can do possession... Script for the DC run of beetlejuice gets here sophistication, and Ive hired someone better bono... Sandworm. ) song information in our house back, we come together to mourn the passing of Emily.! Quot ; -Lydia Deetz one thing that can still stop him na have this crib ready before that gets..., beloved mother to lydia VANILLA would a LITTLE ANGER KILL YA seems that teeter is not with! Your dad, how long do we have dozens of other monologues that you act like a fool... 'S on the marquee, but Hey, Maybe will play its first show on Friday, April 8 2022... Just like Wah, Wah Wah we do not have time to make screaming, passionate, right! Ready to take the NEXT STEP this GUY knows what Im talking about my mom our is! All of that FRIGHT of their LIVES a bunch of Howards and then she was like Lets do this the! That demon with the stupid hair, hell be waiting for us answer a question like that lip her. Find it na have this crib ready before that baby gets here no one expected it Ad! The living with nothing, and beetlejuice musical monologue lydia all- one likes it, throw it out..:. New Car smell people lib. ): yeah, time moves differently when youre,! Back, we have to stay here waiting for us help he needs go! Free, go on, delia: dont worry, Im afraid she be... Hey, Maybe thing that can give him the help he needs you. Ta toss the rule book, beloved mother to lydia chance on!...

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