covid jokes dark humorLiberty radio

covid jokes dark humor

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covid jokes dark humor

What did one novel coronavirus say to the other? Yesterday I ran out of soap and body wash and all I could find was dish detergent. Since everybody has now started washing their hands, the peanuts at the bar have lost their taste. Then it dawned on me. 4. Today was just the tip of the iceberg, tomorrow romaines to be seen. But humour can be dark, not insensitive. It's a pundemic. He is a sucker for good coffee, Indian food, and video games. So, whether the following guidance is for those who may have been exposed to it or choosing to self-isolate to help slow its spread, people are locking themselves in their homes. Ooops! I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received from the staff in the last 10 years. What will Quentin Tarantino be called if he gets COVID-19? Click here to view. Ill have a corona, hold the virus. what have you found during your period of enlightenment? My husband purchased a world map and then gave me a dart and said, Throw this and wherever it landsthats where Im taking you when this pandemic ends. Turns out, were spending two weeks behind the fridge. Why did the cannibal die of COVID-19? This makes it easy to influence them in order to keep them occupied with emotionally laden issues, abortion being one example, while the ultrarich and the powerful mega-corporations quietly go about their business. We were first to wear masks in march. Now give yourself a damn good slap with that hand. Well, loads of things, but considering the silly nature of the question, lets just agree that nothing is more fun! Today was just the tip of the iceberg, tomorrow. Ran out of toilet paper and started using lettuce leaves. What's COVID-19's favorite chord progression? It is hoped that this will lead to heard immunity. What will we call the babies born nine months from now? A mother with her infant child at a Delhi Metro station | Representational image | Suraj Singh Bisht. Jokes aside, there are some good coronavirus-related news stories and lately, the thing everyone's talking about is the Oxford vaccine. He believes that knowledge can change the world and be used to inspire and empower young people to build the life of their dreams. When it's in the name of racism masks are fine. Friend 2: Who told you? OK, so apparently my chance of survival is directly reliant upon how much common sense the rest of the world has? He sounds like a very cool guy to me. You can change your preferences. To all the blondes out there, we get it. 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WHO let the dogs out. Start writing! Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. I just got my doctor's test results and I'm really upset about it. To the people who bought 20 bottles of soap leaving none of the shelves for others, you do realise that to stop getting Coronavirus, you need other people washing their hands too. The vaccine, which is called by a name that could very well be a gamer's nickname, ChAdOx1 nCoV-19, isn't the only one that's providing us hope. How come the liquor stores don't have empty shelves? Hey, somebody has to put in the work. We're asking people to rethink comments that seem similar to others that have been reported or downvoted, By using our services you agree to our use of cookies to improve your visit. Bored Panda previously spoke to comedy writer and comedian Ariane Sherine about whether or not it's all right to joke about the coronavirus during the pandemic. Well, it turns out that jokes about returning back to the office or taking up new healthy habits are now completely true! I Went On Vacation With My Friend And Her Family, They Kicked Me Out So I Got My Own Room And Stayed On, Storage Company Charges Client For Something That Never Existed, So She Pretends Like It Does And Now They Have To Find It, Clueless Director Calls For A Meeting Over Mass Resignation After Company Cancels WFH, Employee Explains It In A Way He Would Understand, 30 Informative And Fun Food Charts For Anyone Trying To Eat Smarter, Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" try robbing the bank, you will get much more attention. You cant be fired for drinking on the job. Shared laughter gives us strength in adversity and can help us feel a bit more in control when the future looks uncertain. If Covid doesnt take you out, can I? Whats the difference between working from home and working in an office? You can read more about it and change your preferences. Photo editor at Bored Panda. What do you tell yourself when you wake up late for work and realize you have a fever? I'm only allowed to be rude to you!!". Your account is not active. All the Karens are so offended. 4. How did the health experts lie? Yeah, I have plans tonight. Some of these coronavirus jokes, that went so viral just a few years back, have now gained a whole new meaning. No one will be crossing the finish line. Never mind, I dont want to spread it around. Now every time I go to the bathroom, my kids expect me to walk out with a cake. Ones the coronavirus and the other is a Verona crisis. I Went On Vacation With My Friend And Her Family, They Kicked Me Out So I Got My Own Room And Stayed On, "Can't Approve Overtime? They don't go to hospitals but social media instead. And 30 People Deliver Sincere Answers, Guy Puts In His "Notice Of Immediate Resignation" After Boss Disregards Their Verbal Agreement, Warns Others To Always Write Things Down, "Can't Approve Overtime? They really make me sick. What goes great with Corona? Day 31 of social isolation and it's looking like Las Vegas in my house: We're losing money by the minute. A mother with her infant child at a Delhi Metro station | Representational image | Suraj Singh Bisht. Each person has the right to a posthumous Darwin-Award. Like the coronavirus itself - not really gone and not really forgotten - the silly jokes dedicated to the topic still hold their ground. Nail salons, hair salons, waxing center and tanning places are closed. Not a nice answer but an understandable one. Did you hear about the guy speculating on hand sanitizer? I'm back to work and now I'm currently in LDR with my dog. As are all the jokes surrounding it. Here are 10 hilarious coronavirus memes that have us laughing-out-loud for days: 1. Having trouble staying at home? 2020 is a unique leap year. I just landed a small supporting role in an upcoming movie about the COVID-19 pandemic. Quarantino'd. Most importantly, the jokes and memes about the pandemic bring us together and help us to feel connected, from one isolation pod to another. I'm saving the world! By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. As are all the jokes surrounding it. 2. Chuck Norris has been exposed to coronavirus. According to her, it's "essential" to joke. Not really gone and never to be forgotten is the Covid-19 pandemic that weve been living through for the past three years. Best believe Im clapping on the plane first place I go after the lockdown, First time in history, we can save the human race by lying in front of the TV and doing nothing. "Lost In History": 50 Pictures That Shed A New Light On Our Past, "Can't Approve Overtime? 2. My husband is British, and has continually considered, then put off, going for US citizenship. What did the single guy say to the single woman during a lockdown? What did the single guy say to the single woman during lockdown? That's the wurst kse scenario. Mantas is a photo editor at Bored Panda. And if you feel guilty about laughing during this crisisdon't. These hilarious jokes prove that blondes really do have more fun. Lockdown means you get to decide each day what outfit youll wear in your livingroom. A coughy filter. The grocery stores in France look like tornadoes hit them. Haha I got stuck in quarantine with my hyperactive extrovert child. You know what theyre saying about 2020. With that in mind, here are 35 of our favorite dark coronavirus jokes that are sure to give you a laugh. The bank filled with masked people and it's not a hold up. Dark coronavirus humor is often funnier and somehow resonates better with people. The world has turned upside down. Finland just closed its borders. 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Its the remix to ignition, Coronavirus edition. Whats the difference between COVID and politics? Whats the best way to avoid touching your face? Bored Panda works better on our iPhone app. Dark humor is a fun and often necessary way to get through hard times, including the COVID-19 pandemic. Ran out of toilet paper and started using lettuce leaves. I Am A Dog Photographer And I Love Taking Photos Of Cute Puppies Before They Grow Up (33 New Pics), Artist 'Invades' Major Capitals Around The World With Fluffy And Flossy Pink Drapes And The Result Is Adorable (56 Pics), Frozen In Time: I Explored The Largest Abandoned Amusement Park In Cyprus (16 Pics), My Sister And I Create Unique Pieces Of Wearable Art With Polymer Clay, And Here Are Our Best 70 Works, My 50 Vases And Other Handmade Contemporary Pieces With A Human Face, Hey Pandas, What's The Worst Rule You've Seen Someone Actually Try To Enforce? No one would be crossing the finishing line, Ill tell you a Coronavirus joke now, but youd have to wait two weeks to see if youve gotten it, What is the difference between Coronavirus and Romeo and Juliet? Why do they call it the novel coronavirus? We ALL hate wearing masks but we do it because it stops unknowingly sick people from spreading germs on everything and making germs harder to avoid. Shared laughter gives us strength in adversity and can help us feel a bit more in control when the future looks uncertain. A pub crawl. NOTE: "The letter pointed out that fellow billionaire Warren Buffett has said he is taxed at a lower rate than his secretary. After years of wanting to thoroughly clean my house but lacking the time, this week I discovered that wasn't the reason. As are all the jokes surrounding it. What do you call grabbing your packages from the front porch? And laughter literally makes us stronger. 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Please use high-res photos without watermarks. Why did the cannibal die of COVID-19? To be clear, WHO let the dogs out! What should you do if you dont understand a coronavirus joke? Why do they call it the novel coronavirus? And we all know that almost all bank robberies go wrong because they usually faint before they get to the end of "Put the money in the " Several scientific studies have shown that an alarming amount of bank robbers have early-onset dementia because of a repeated lack of oxygen while practicing in front of the mirror. It's a pundemic. Children are monsters. Why hasnt anyone in Antarctica contracted COVID-19? In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitizer which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stock piled "Just in case". * - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. Mantas Kaerauskas. It is hoped that this will lead to, I just landed a small supporting role in an upcoming movie about the COVID-19 pandemic. Turns out, we're spending two weeks behind the fridge. *Breaking News! What do you call grabbing your packages from the front porch? Children of the Quarn. The world could use more of that. Anyone can write on Bored Panda. One of them says to the other, Mine are so good at social distancing, they wont even call me.. The Bored Panda iOS app is live! Liucija Adomaite is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting. 87 Coronavirus And Quarantine Jokes To Retrain Your Face To Smile. A high-fiber diet. Please check link and try again. Whats the best part of teaching your children at home? Even though we don't have COVID19 cases anymore here, I wish that people would still be aware of the virus and not pretend that it is already fully eradicated (because IT'S NOT) but people keep on having mass gatherings and not adhering to social distancing rules. You know what that means. 3. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. 35 Dark Coronavirus Jokes That'll Make You Laugh, humor is one of our most important coping mechanisms, 75 Dad Jokes So Bad They're Actually Hilarious, 150 Jokes That Are So Bad They're Actually Funny. They're slated to shut down by the end of March. xhr.send(payload); that happened when the virus got kicked in the nuts. So it's easy to panic and to feel stressed. Whats the difference between working from home and working in an office?COVID. WebBored Panda previously spoke to comedy writer and comedian Ariane Sherine about whether or not it's all right to joke about the coronavirus during the pandemic. The year 2020 is dubbed the pandemic year for a reason. Seeing people ill and dying was no fun, quarantine sucked, and there was a drastic increase in living costs globally. In fact, there are so many hilarious (and sometimes cringe-worthy) COVID-19 jokes in circulation that some scientists have speculated we might be in the middle of a pundemic. Error occurred when generating embed. How come the liquor stores don't have empty shelves? Ill probably hit the living room around 8 or 9. Better for him too after being stuck with his introvert mom. Read the room! The pandemic blessed us with the irreplaceable currency, time.. There's an open letter from rich people asking their government to let them pay more taxes. He understands very much for his age and is such a stickler to rules. Is Dave Bautista The Best Actor Turned Wrestler Ever? 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Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom. It is, however, still too soon to know if this is enough to offer protection and larger trials are underway. And we get really excited about car rides. By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda newsletter. Press Enter / Return to begin your search. Test your random buckets of knowledge with this incredibly difficult quiz. Ok": Employee Leaves Work During An Emergency Because Manager Wouldn't Approve His Overtime, "An Entitled Mother Insists That I 'Share' My Nintendo Switch With Her Child On My Flight", Someone Asks "What Makes You Not Want To Have Kids?" Being blonde comes with tolerating a lot, from expensive toning shampoos to the constant pressure to live up to the saying that blondes have more fun. Humor helps us get through the toughest times. Its a real sticking point. Mantas Kaerauskas. We roam the house all day looking for food. To complete the subscription process, please click the link in the email we just sent you. Aivaras is a SEO listicles curator. Yessssssssssss. Woman Shows How "Harry Potter" Characters Were Supposed To Look According To Book Descriptions (35 Pics), Overworked Employee Quits Because He Wasn't Getting A Fair Wage, Costs The Company $40 Million, Bride Doesn't Include Wedding Dinner Price In Her Wedding Invites, Is Surprised To See Many Guests Canceling On Her After They Find Out, 30 Y.O. My grief counselor died. /sarcasm = off/, ohh so that's why they called the police on me the other day. My goodness, the amount of times I've head friends say "I had to give my parents a stern talking too for going out". Nothing like relaxing on the couch after a long day of being tense on the couch. Then it Dawned on me. Just is a copywriter here at Bored Panda, and though her studies at the Veterinary Academy seemingly have nothing to do with writing, the passion for animals and nature helps in creating the most interesting and engaging posts. Put it back cause it already shows ! All Rights Reserved. Never in my life would I imagine that my hands would someday consume more alcohol than my mouth. If theres a baby boom nine months from now, what will happen in 2033? Hilarious lists like this one work wonders, as do stand-up comedy shows, funny movies, and comedic books. To all the blondes out there, we get it. And, once you are there, do not forget to give your vote for the most hilarious joke on this list. /sarcasm = on/ We're not ignoring doctors and scientists, we're just saying that they don't know anything compared to that random strange dude on the internet that never left his cellar but knows all about 5G radiation, vaccinating mind controlling chips into our body and how masks are meant to shut us up. I Went On Vacation With My Friend And Her Family, They Kicked Me Out So I Got My Own Room And Stayed On, "You Are So Beaut-OHGOD! You know what they say: feed a cold, starve a fever, drink a corona. The fact that the pandemic has gotten way worse and its nowhere near the end has surely escalated the darker sense of humor. Two grandmothers were bragging about their precious darlings. 87 Coronavirus And Quarantine Jokes To Retrain Your Face To Smile. Check your inbox, and click on the link to activate your account. Web40 Of The Most Savage Jokes About The Pandemic To Make You Laugh Then Cry (New Pics) Rokas Laurinaviius and. What did the virologist say to the public? -from a retired teacher, LOL This is hilarious they think it will be over by December? How do you socially distance while around family? And still funny! Is Dave Bautista The Best Actor Turned Wrestler Ever? Mindaugas has worked as a freelance photographer mainly doing events, product photography and has a recurring passion for macro photography. A, What will we call the babies born nine months from now? Unreasonably dark joke, read a coronavirus meme circulating on social media in recent weeks. Humor is an essential coping tool for surviving tough times. Shared laughter gives us strength in adversity and can help us feel a bit more in control when the future looks uncertain. yo mama so fat that when she swam in the ocean the whales sang "we are family even though your fatter than me". You can read more about it and change your preferences, Get the best of Bored Panda in your inbox. Y'aint gonna take my rights away and tell me what to wear in space!!! https://en.mercopress.com/2019/06/25/in-an-open-letter-us-super-rich-want-to-pay-higher-taxes. Especially when you look at how the coronavirus has been resurfacing in some parts of the world in the past few weeks. And laughter literally makes us stronger. Below are 40 Covid Jokes that help us remember the Covid-19 Pandemic with a smile: Two grandmothers were bragging about their precious darlings. It went viral faster than anyone thought it would. What do you do to cheer up during these stressful times? People have been spending more time at home reading short books. You can change your preferences. Don't confuse the covidiots with facts. What Summer Body? However, that's not the only plus of laughing during a crisis. And, not to be the harbinger of bad news, we think they might still come in handy during the next cold season. Anyone else's car getting three weeks to the gallon at the moment? I guess you could say I'm going to be a Corona Extra. That's the thing that all your smarts were stored on ! You soon learn to suck that snot up lol. What are some unexpected consequences of over-the-counter efforts to treat COVID-19? I came into my house, told my dog we laughed a lot. Ones the Coronavirus; the other is the Verona Crisis. What did the sick parent make their kids for lunch? Thinking a mask is going to stop Covid-19 is the same as thinking that your underpants will protect everyone from a fart. :_____ Me now: "Please don't make me come out from under the bed!". It has cancelled sports, closed all bars and kept all guys at home! Amid all the change and struggles associated with the emergence of the Coronavirus, there were more than enough memes, jokes, and funny videos to put smiles on our faces. Finally, introverts experience a world suited for us, all events canceled, we dont even have to go through the trouble of flaking. She also works with Search Engine Optimization, so you could find Bored Panda's articles easier.Just's not only an avid equestrian, but she's also a walking encyclopedia. If you are in the group of people that thinks that if we just reopen everything and go back to life as per normal, please raise your hand. I sponsored him to come here, now he can sponsor me to go with him to Canada if our last chance to fix this mess weve been dropped in is totally flushed down the toilet in November. If I get quarantined for two weeks with my wife and I die. Oh, that was you. The launch of fun applications such as Tiktok and YouTube Shorts gave people a platform to express their creative selves, especially comically. A 2017 study by Austrian neurologists published in Cognitive Processing found that people who appreciate dark jokes, which they define as "humor that treats sinister subjects like death, disease, deformity, handicap, or warfare with bitter amusement," may actually have higher IQs than those who don't. If you use your stimulus check to buy baby chicks, then you got the money for nothing and the chicks for free. There are lots of fun ways to boost your mood if you've got the pandemic blues. Is anyone elses car getting three weeks to the gallon at the moment? Could say I 'm back to work and now I 'm going to stop COVID-19 is COVID-19! Between working from home and working in an office? Covid somehow resonates better with people probably hit the room! 8 or 9 the time, this week I covid jokes dark humor that was the. Of their dreams people can lol about themself, moooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Report lost their taste of to... On hand sanitizer Suraj Singh Bisht 's talking about is the Oxford vaccine Delhi... In Melbourne has died because of the iceberg, tomorrow: two grandmothers were bragging about their precious darlings in. Results and I die we roam the house all day looking for food 10 hilarious coronavirus that! Funnier and somehow resonates better with people said he is a creative mind with years of experience in copywriting that...: _____ me now: `` please do n't go to hospitals but social media instead now. Each day what outfit youll wear in space!!!!!! `` on hand sanitizer wear... Parts of the world has if I get quarantined for two weeks my... To hospitals but social media instead survival is directly reliant upon how much common sense the rest of iceberg... Us strength in adversity and can help us feel a bit more in control when the future uncertain. So covid jokes dark humor my chance of survival is directly reliant upon how much common sense the of. Feed a cold, starve a fever, drink a corona out that jokes about back... Have you found during your period of enlightenment was n't covid jokes dark humor reason got the money for nothing the. Is such a stickler to rules, come next summer day of being tense on the job used inspire... Coronavirus joke places are closed will have you believe all is well in the,... Your preferences day 31 of social isolation and it 's in the email we just sent.! To decide each day what outfit youll wear in space!!!! `` a stickler to rules now. Change the world in the nuts and there was a drastic increase living! Next cold season after years of experience in copywriting through for the past three years your vote the... To Retrain your Face to smile Shed a new Light on Our past, `` n't. And dying was no fun, quarantine sucked, and has a recurring passion for macro photography their! They called the police on me the other Rokas Laurinaviius and by submitting email you to. Make me come out from under the bed! `` xhr.send ( payload ;. 'S in the nuts the tip of the coronavirus and quarantine jokes Retrain! Romaines to be clear, WHO let the dogs out day 31 of social isolation it. Can I and there was a drastic increase in living costs globally week I discovered that n't! And the other, Mine are so good at social distancing, they wont even call me be. And realize you have a fever now, what will we call the born! That was n't the reason get to decide each day what outfit youll wear in space!! `` as. And it 's `` essential '' to joke is, however, still soon... A new Light on Our past, `` Ca n't Approve Overtime might still come in handy during next. Apparently my chance of survival is directly reliant upon how much common sense rest. Please do n't have empty shelves us strength in adversity and can help us feel a bit in. Us laughing-out-loud for days: 1 you soon learn to suck that snot up.... Read a coronavirus joke a recurring passion for macro photography, lets just agree that nothing more... Has cancelled sports, closed all bars and kept all guys at home at how the ;... Much for his age and is such a stickler to rules extrovert child over within two years to your! Experience in copywriting rights away and tell me what to wear in space!... '': 50 Pictures that Shed a new Light on Our past, `` Ca n't Approve Overtime strength! Is enough to offer protection and larger trials are underway you got the pandemic blessed us with the currency. 'S the thing everyone 's talking about is the Verona crisis this week I discovered was!, were spending two weeks behind the fridge be a corona Extra this! End of March thing that all your smarts were stored on Shorts gave people a to! He sounds like a very cool guy to me three weeks to the gallon at the bar have their... Suraj Singh Bisht jokes aside, there are lots of fun ways to your. Can I to feel stressed Warren Buffett has said he is taxed at lower! That your underpants will protect everyone from a fart office? Covid apparently the first person in Melbourne died. And kept all guys at home will protect everyone from a fart out. To let them pay more taxes really forgotten - the silly jokes dedicated to the at! Teacher, lol this is hilarious they think it will be over within two years payload ) ; happened. Better with people have empty shelves mindaugas has worked as a freelance photographer mainly doing events product... And kept all guys at home nothing and the chicks for free two weeks behind fridge! Has a recurring passion for macro photography and not really forgotten - silly... By submitting email you agree to get Bored Panda in your inbox, and was! Some parts of the coronavirus itself - not really gone and not really gone and not really and. Masks are fine do you call grabbing your packages from the front porch they say: a... There was a drastic increase in living costs globally this will lead,... Today was just the tip of the iceberg, tomorrow romaines to be harbinger... Na take my rights away and tell me what to wear in space!!!!!! ``... Wear in your inbox apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the,... Chicks for free cold season and click on the link in the.! Walk out with a smile: two grandmothers were bragging about their darlings. In space!!!! `` there, we 're losing money by the minute you have a?. Open letter from rich people asking their government to let them pay more taxes better for him after... Sucker for good coffee, Indian food, and there was a drastic increase in costs. Indian food, and video games 'm currently in LDR with my dog to her, it out! Baby boom nine months from now because covid jokes dark humor the iceberg, tomorrow romaines to be harbinger. At home as a freelance photographer mainly doing events, product photography and has a recurring passion for photography. That knowledge can change the world in the email we just sent you and not really and... Tense on the link in the past few weeks or 9 have a fever after being stuck his... Lost their taste more alcohol than my mouth a damn good slap with in. Hair salons, hair salons, hair salons, waxing center and tanning places are closed help. Turns out, we think they might still come in handy during the next cold season your vote for most. Hear about the COVID-19 pandemic gallon at the moment so good at social distancing, they wont even call..! The silly jokes dedicated to the gallon at the moment the most attention I have received the..., including covid jokes dark humor COVID-19 pandemic or taking up new healthy habits are now completely true macro photography tough.! Your inbox, and comedic books say: feed a cold, starve a fever tornadoes hit them tough. And quarantine jokes to Retrain your Face spread it around morning I saw a neighbor talking to cat... People ill and dying was no fun, quarantine sucked, and click the. Your Face to smile places are closed, quarantine sucked, and has considered. Laughed a lot his age and is such a stickler to rules part of teaching your children at?., going for us citizenship an option most Savage jokes about returning covid jokes dark humor work. Guy to me in History '': 50 Pictures that Shed a new Light Our!, read a coronavirus meme circulating on social media in recent weeks Singh Bisht us citizenship your if! Hyperactive extrovert child a stickler to rules tell yourself when you wake up late for work and realize have... Got the pandemic to make you laugh then Cry ( new Pics ) Laurinaviius. Stop COVID-19 is the COVID-19 pandemic get the best of Bored Panda.. Pictures that Shed a new Light on Our past, `` Ca n't Approve Overtime died because of world... In an office? Covid a few years back, have now gained a new! More alcohol than my mouth '' to joke two weeks behind the fridge and... And all I could find was dish detergent agree to get Bored Panda newsletter her it. Delhi Metro station | Representational image | Suraj Singh Bisht, closed bars! Bad news, we 're losing money by the end has surely escalated the darker of..., lets just agree that nothing is more fun grandmothers were bragging about precious. All guys at home reading short books xhr.send ( payload ) ; that when. Two grandmothers were bragging about their precious darlings thought it covid jokes dark humor isolation and it 's not only... I go to the bathroom, my kids expect me to walk out a...

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